Potter's visit

My God son came to the office today to pay me a visit. He also treated my husband & me pizza as he received his bonus yesterday. Thanks Potter, that is very kind of you :)

I am so sorry to hear about Dean's demise. He will be missed ... eventhough I don't know him personally but from the photoes & stories of him, I am sure he is a great gerbil. Rest in peace Dean ...

Potter is one of those who were involved in the 'incident' recently ( the facebook incident - thus it shall be named ). I am so grateful that he is one of those who realises the importance of 'roots' - where we come from/ who 'made' us who we are today kinda stuff ... Honoured to be his God mum :) The world need more people like you Potter ...

Will be writing soon ...

confused? dazzed? amnesia?

It has been 4 days since it happened but I still cannot put a finger on it ... hence the title up there :p

Well, it happened on Saturday ( 20 June 2009 ), at night I received a text message from her. The text message was like nothing had happened in the past few weeks - it was as if she had amnesia or she fell on her head or something. I was like - what the hell???

She was like asking how I am doing, am i busy, she haven't heard from me for quite some time, she heard from my Mom that I went to see my Mom on my way back from Port Dickson attending a training, how she have this souvenir from US that she haven't given to me, bla, bla, bla ... Again, what the hell?

She acted as if she & her sons did not call me names ( namely dog,frog,mosquitoes among other monstority that they could come up with ) for the last few weeks following the terrible horror on facebook. She was the one who called me 'orang yg busuk hati, tak boleh tgk org lain berbaik baik', 'nyamuk yg bising kat rumah org yg kalu spray tak jalan, patut dipijak sampai mati, kalau tak mati jugak-pinjam kapak Auntie Elly - kapak sampai mati'. Her sons were the ones saying that 'my ass, katak bawah tempurung', 'perangai sendiri macam anjing, ada hati nak sound org lain', among other things that I wish I can tattoo them on their heads.

And now, this 'as-if-nothing-had-happened' attitude ... Sorry, talk to the hand ... I have better things to do than to 'entertain' you. And what, you thought that by texting me & 'enticing' me with the souvenir from US, I could just forget & forgive all those nasty things you did & said to me? Again, sorry - talk to the hand.

Some people ... I wonder ... what goes in their head .. or heads?

a chat on life ...

i had the pleasure of chatting with arshad today ... about life in general ...he came to sit for his quiz ( short semester ), i texted him to ask abt simba ... then he came to my desk & had a lengthy chat about the ups & downs of life, the humour, the horror and all those in betweens ...

i told him about the sad fact that as we grow older, we will eventually become wiser but we will wish that we could have that wisdom when we were young ... stuffs like that ...

will keep this one short ...

negative aura all around me :(

For the past few days ( 2 weeks give & take ) , I have been surrounded by negative auras - started with the 3 days diarhoea, then the night when mizi ran over a cat while we were in the car travelling to nurul's house, the death of Leo ( a kitten my husband rescued from the LRT ) + followed by this irritating fever / cough / headache. Argghh ... I felt like I need to cleanse the aura - somehow ... I have no ideas how ... but it is clear, I need to do something.

Pray for me ...

solitude ...

I am currently at home, having diarhoea for the past 2 days ... must have been those crabs i ate at this fancy restaurant for mizi's birthday celebration ... the crab was watery, the flesh has liquidified ... but hey, it was a birthday celebration in which his fiance did her best to please everyone ... i salute her for trying so hard :)

solitude is a bliss, i woke up at 12.07 p.m yesterday ... it was bloody tiring - running to the toilet ( literally ) for more than 5 times in a duration of less than 10 hours ok ... today, i woke up early in my best effort to go to work but the little devil had its own plan ... the marathon started again, i had been to the toilet for 4 times today ( now it is 1.50 p.m ) ... there goes another day ...

so here i am at home ... in solitude.

the rest of the story for 2nd entry - no mood now. the only thing that i am concerned now is the state of my colon ... oooppps got to go.

the reason behind it all ...

why do i blog ( again ) ...

well, let us put it this way ... in real life, i am often mistaken for someone else who i am not ... my friends,colleagues and students ( who, mostly, will become my friends/my family - god-daughter, god-son, pet-sis, pet-bro - u name it, they are on the list ) understand & accepted me better than my own flesh & blood namely my sister.

she had hated me since the day i came into this world,that was a long time ago by the way ... later when i was in the secondary school, she told me the reason. she said that she was hoping for a baby brother, not a baby sister. she wanted to be the only girl in the siblings - my brother being the eldest. she wanted to be the main attraction - so called ... so that my parents would pamper her as she would be the only girl ... BUT, God had other plans for her .. too bad ...

she used to tell me that i was adopted ... i was not a part of the family, that was why I am not as fair as her, etc ... she blackmailed me, she manipulated me, she pinched me & stuffs ...

during her internship in sarawak, my mom & i accompanied her there ... my mom was worried if she were to be there alone ... plus, i did quite well in my exam ( penilaian darjah lima at that time ), so it was like a reward for me as well ... we hunted for houses to be rented, we took the bus, we went to stay with strangers while searching for houses, for her ... then, we found the house and being her, before she went to work in the morning, she gave me a verbal list of things to do around the house such as sweeping, cleaning,etc ... when she got home in the evening, she practically run her fingers on the floor, stairs & furniture to see if there was any dust on it ... OMG, i was turned into the maid - all those while i thought this is my reward for performing well in my exam :( ... one of the episodes of so many other sad events ...

then, after she completed her diploma, she got married & left the house ... she followed her husband who was then working in USA ... while i was in a boarding school, she wrote to me - a few pages of letters - some kind of 'bonding' with me, trying to explain the things she did to me - about wishing for a younger brother & stuff ... when she came back, things were better between us ... i thought ... well, the past is the past, look forward to the future ... later in life, she got her wishes - in a rather ironic way, she got four boys as sons ... no daughter at all ... good for her as now she can live her dreams ... me & her, life goes on ... so the past was put way behind us ...

but recently, things change for the worse ...or perhaps the better ... it's all God's plan, so we'll see ...

1st entry - always the sincerest :)

*deep breath* ... my 1st entry ...
i decided to create a new blog for myself where there is no rules ... i can say what i want, no spelling errors where everything is accepted and so on ... muahahahahaha ( evil laughs )

as the name suggested, this is the place where i let off some steam - anger, frustration, dissatisfaction and do as i please ... muahahahaha ( evil laughs again ) ...

enough said ... i will definetely write in the nearest future ... can't do that now, my husband is here sitting in front of me ... too much distraction ...

see ya ...